[Anonymous]

#1056627

It’s a miracle! I slept for 6 hours last night without waking up
once!!! sure I’m still feeling exhausted, my body aches and my eyes
are bloodshot as heck. But I did manage to do laundry and a few other
things that I had let slip by in the last couple days.

Sometimes I have to put myself in the frame of mind of the story book
character The Little Train That Could, and say to myself over and
over, “I think I can, I think I can” kind of silly but—

Have a great day everyone.

Shannon.

[Anonymous]

#1163918

Hi Shannon,

I notice with my shoulder/arm, which is much better than it was for a time, and yet
in no way a regular arm…but so much better that the relief is
something I can function out of ( almost for somethings). I don’t know
how long it would take for me to feel this level of pain as unacceptable if it remained chronic,
and then how long to adjust in acceptance if it was really my ongoing lot.
But pain sure is weird…it is a relationship that costs alot.
I know that I get excited when I get any reprieve in my eyes….
Like they could still be awful…but if they feely slightly better, I am
so grateful. Take me a smidge in the other direction,
so I am in reality not really that much worse and gone is any
appreciation, etc.; I am clinging primally and all but essentials fall
away to deal with the downward turn. So. I know that it isn’t all in
my actual condition, but somehow I am in there either freaking out or comforting myself
about the whole deal and it really does make a diference.
One thing i have discovered is that any false comfort is very dangerous.
“Pollyanna” was an idiot..( sorry to any of you real Polly’s) I can’t get anything out of
telling myself lies , like ” everyday in every way I am getting better and better”.
Life is a process of falling apart after a certain age, which I met and
have p[assed by and probably underappreciated at the time. So, somehow that inner
dialogue of mine better at least skim near the truth. That’s why I think freaking out
is probably helpful too, it is so real as long as I don’t get stuck there.
Denial is only helpful for absolute emergencies…then facts are handier.
Nasty words do help sometimes, and like Luci says…just having big knives..
but only for awhile. Over six hours of sleep helps more…yes yes.
We were well matched this last week. I was waking like an alarm rang
after just a few hours…but last night I got 5 1/2 hours!!!
So, just a big long rambling hi and hang in there…
Jeannette

[Anonymous]

#1163919

Jeanette,
A very well said ramble!
I have just started sleeping well the last couple of weeks.
I’ve been getting about 6 to 7 hours, instead of the 4 or 5 hours
I had been getting for months. Thats really a relief.
Yesterday morning I was awakened at 5a.m. Phone call from my brother
in Wisconsin telling me my sister’s husband in Kansas had died a couple
of hours earlier. He was 56 and had just retired Friday from his job as
a counsilor with the state employment service. They just had his retire-
ment party and everything. One day of retirement and died in bed. Don’t
know the cause yet. Well, we are off to the furneral tomorrow morning.
What a shock.
Lanny

[Anonymous]

#1163920

Just to pick up on your point about falling apart after a certain age, and recalling that this view has been expressed previously on this BB, I felt compelled to add my support to this view.

In fact, someone at my workplace a number of years ago told me that once you hit 40 (yes, I’ll come clean!) your body starts to degenerate. Having now passed this milestone, I have to wholeheartedly agree from personal experience and exposure to others in the same boat.

I’ve had a bulging disc which pressed on my sciatic nerve for which I’ve had a spinal injection to cause the disc to shrink back into place and manipulation under general anaesthetic. So many others around me have had long term injuries (let alone diseases) that have come out of the blue, with the common factor being their age.

Of course there are exceptions, but it is interesting to look around you and see the degenerative conditions that develop around 40 years of age. For those of you who are younger than 40, take care! For those of you past the critical age, commiserations, but take comfort from the fact that we’re in this together!

[Author]

Posts