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      Post count: 93172

      Thanks Dee for starting my Thursday off with a good laugh and a big smile! :>)

        Post count: 93172

        That one had me laughing for 20 minutes!
        I needed a good laugh this morning!
        Thank You, DeniseD!

          Post count: 93172

          One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her
          class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to
          correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off.

          She started with “This was England’s finest hour.” Little Suzy instantly
          jumped up and said, ” Winston Churchill.”

          “Congratulations said the teacher you may go home.”

          The teacher then said, “Ask not what your country can do for you.”
          Before she could finish this quote, another young lady belts out, “John
          F. Kennedy”.

          “Very good” says the teacher, “you may go.”

          Irritated that he has missed two golden opportunities, Little Johnny
          said, “I wish those girls would just shut up.”

          Upon overhearing this comment, the outraged teacher demanded to know who
          said it. Johnny instantly rose to his feet and said, “Bill Clinton. I’ll
          see you Monday.”

          Have a nice day!

            Post count: 93172

            A friend just sent me this one I could not resist:)

            A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, “You are
            going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything
            about you.”
            The frog says, “This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or
            “No,” says the psychic. “Next semester in her biology class.”

              Post count: 93172

              Another great tickler from our resident jokester, Denise!
              Thank you again for perking up our day!


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                Hmmmmmm!, Points to Ponder

                -Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?

                -It’s a dog eat dog world out there. And they’re short on napkins.

                -Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.

                -One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

                -Atheism is a non prophet organization.

                -If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys
                and apes?

                -The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the
                bad girls live.

                -Never trust a stockbroker who’s married to a travel agent.

                -Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.

                -Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?

                -It must be true that men are from Mars. Look at how the place has

                -On the other hand, you have different fingers.

                -Married people don’t live longer than single people. It just seems

                -I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, “Where’s the
                self-help section?” She said if she told me, it would defeat the

                -If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they
                all still working?

                Have a great day!

                  Post count: 93172

                  THE COWBOY:
                  > >
                  The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo
                  theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the
                  cowboy, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.” The cowboy
                  groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient. “Sir, if
                  you don’t get up from there, I’m going to have to call the manager. The
                  cowboy just groaned.

                  The usher marched briskly back up the aisle. In a moment he returned
                  with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the
                  cowboy, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop
                  surveyed the situation briefly then asked, “All right buddy, what’s
                  you’re name?”

                  “Sam,” the cowboy moaned.

                  “Where ya from, Sam?”

                  With pain in his voice Sam replied…. “The balcony.”

                  Well Happy Thanksgiving to my Canadian friends and Happy Columbus Day, to the
                  US, friends!

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