[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 6:31 am Post count: 93172]

#1050229

HI All
My doc took me off xanax and put me on sleeping pills since I only took the xanax at night. I cant turn myself off, cant sleep, i have pain in my legs<from being tense?>, my mind is racing and i’m scared. I feel like the path everyone takes to death naturally is in fast forward in my hyper state. It feels like I am dying. I cant go on like this. I’m crying now and wish it would just slow down any little bit at all.
I feel like if I dont get back on the antianxiety pills I’m going to go insane. My pcp doesnt want to prescribe them, my endo was reluctant and my only hope is the therapist that I still dont have a referral to.
By the way the sleeping pills do nothing for me….I find myself wide awake at 3-4 in the morning after taking two of them.
My thyroid uptake showed 95% absorbed in 6hours and my tsh was 0.005 My free T4 was 3.86 Does anyone know how bad off I am?
Isnt there anything I can do til I get back on antianxiety drugs to slow me down. Why arent doctors compassionate? Are they completely ignorant what it is like to be speeding through life like an out-of-control maniac? I am so desperate for help. And why is it that sometimes I feel more hyper than others?
When I get my psychology degree I will not dismiss people. God help us all.
Trying to live,
Wanda

[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 10:41 am Post count: 93172]

#1148757

Hi Wanda,
Why did he take you off xanax? I think you should call him and tell him even maybe both your GP and your Endo, until they get your levels into a normal range you felt better on xanax. I honestly know how awful that is to be zipping along every day and all night. I was on xanax for anxiety years ago it was the only thing that saved me during that period. Your test results sound like you are still hyper, I just don’t see a reason to rock the boat for you now.
Take care Wanda, You will make a Very good psychcologist. You are certainly getting first hand experience!
Blessings, Sally

[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 12:57 pm Post count: 93172]

#1148758

Wanda,
I hear you and am there. I found both my doc and my endo to be unsympathetic to my emotional turmoil. Requests for antidepressants and counseling referals went unanswered and dismissed with the words “it takes time.” Sometimes we don’t feel like there is any time left. I didn’t get any response until I insisted they see me when I was in one of the worst depressions I’ve ever experienced. I actually sobbed to them and told them I don’t want to live anymore like this. I also made sure they understood that I wasn’t talking about taking my own life. That’s when I finally got action…fast action. Sometimes they don’t believe what they hear, they have to see it. The other thing I tried yesterday might work for you and maybe for some others. I found myself crying for 2 solid hours, feeling like I just can’t carry this load anymore. I’ve tried and tried and I just can’t do it. Finally I thought of an idea that might help. I thought that if I could put all those things that were too heavy (being sick, being a burden, Graves’ Disease, guilt, etc.) in a box, I could put it down for a while and maybe feel a little better. That’s exactly what I did. I found a box, put a label on it that said “April’s Burden”, and wrote what I needed to put down on little slips of paper that I put in the box. I then put the box on a shelf and took a deep breath. I did feel a little lighter. I know that when I feel a little stronger, I can pick up the box and carry all or part of it. Don’t know if this will help, but thought I’d share.
Feeling for you and sending hugs,
April

[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 4:47 pm Post count: 93172]

#1148759

Dear Wanda:{
Well, Wanda,I don’t dare ask how you are,you might come through my computer and get me,I’m sorry I shouldn’t joke at a time like this. Anyways Wanda,who the **** is your doctor,does he not know one should be weened off this drug,at least I;m pretty sure that they do,as my sister took this drug and I’m damn near psitive she had to be weened off of it,and if this is the case then no wonder your sitting there on pins girl.You need to phone the emergency room and see if they can tell you or go there they might give you enough until you can get to see your own doctor even if you have to tell them you ran out on the weekend ,might help I don’t know but if I was that desperate this is what I would do if I had too Wanda.I for one really feel for you as I have felt this way before to the point that I couln’t even answer my door,it’s an awfull place to be. I ‘ll be thinking about you tonight girl and hope you get some relief soon,little warrior Barb.

[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 4:48 pm Post count: 93172]

#1148760

Dear Wanda:{
Well, Wanda,I don’t dare ask how you are,you might come through my computer and get me,I’m sorry I shouldn’t joke at a time like this. Anyways Wanda,who the **** is your doctor,does he not know one should be weened off this drug,at least I;m pretty sure that they do,as my sister took this drug and I’m damn near psitive she had to be weened off of it,and if this is the case then no wonder your sitting there on pins girl.You need to phone the emergency room and see if they can tell you or go there they might give you enough until you can get to see your own doctor even if you have to tell them you ran out on the weekend ,might help I don’t know but if I was that desperate this is what I would do if I had too Wanda.I for one really feel for you as I have felt this way before to the point that I couln’t even answer my door,it’s an awfull place to be. I ‘ll be thinking about you tonight girl and hope you get some relief soon,little warrior Barb.

[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 5:38 pm Post count: 93172]

#1148761

Hey listen,
Yall, no doctor bashing but My MD gave me Proizac, he does not intend on taking me off untikl I feel better,
Guys , the minds go nuts, it does not matter that it is also a physical ailment…… THEDOCTORSHOULD TAKE CARE OF THE WHOLE PERSON and taht includes helping with some antidep-ressants.
SORY FOR THE SOAP BOX
Hugs to all
PAULA

[Anonymous July 12, 1998 at 11:36 pm Post count: 93172]

#1148762

I think it is especially hard to be assertive with our docs when we are feeling emotionally vulnerable, but it is so important that we let them know what is happening to us.

I waited so long when I felt horrible after my RAI, and as soon as I contacted my doc he put me back on PTU. I felt really disappointed that he didn’t warn me what might happen, and if I had been reading the bb back then I probably would have known enough to expect it and get treatment right away.

I am learning to demand more attention through phone calls, faxes, calls to the nurses in the office, letters, etc. They need to know what we’re going through, and we might have to remind them a lot. I had to ask more than once that my actual thyroid results be sent to me rather than the form letter saying my bloodwork was either “normal” or “abnormal”.

If you don’t get the treatment you need and deserve, there are usually other docs out there.

So, Wanda, hang in there, and please let your doc know what’s happening with you. Then it’s his job to help you.

Wishing you the best,
Elaine

[Anonymous July 13, 1998 at 5:16 am Post count: 93172]

#1148763

You poor girl! For heaven’s sake, did your doctor take you off Xanax
cold turkey, without gradually taking you off in slow increments? If he did
find another doctor who will put you back on Xanax temporarily and then
if you need to get off help you wean yourself off SLOWLY. Anyway, find
a doctor that is not so afraid of Xanax being addictive.

I have been on Xanax for almost five years, and I weaned myself down to
1/2 a .25 mg. tablet twice a day, and have been at that dosage for over
a year and a half or so, and have seldom felt the need to take more that.

I would invite you to visit the tAPir Panic and Anxiety site on the internet. There
are several discussion boards there: one for medications and the effect
they have on us, one for support, and one where you can talk to an online
psychiatrist. Just knowing that others are experiencing the same symptoms
can be a comfort. Just type the title I gave you above in your browser’s
search blank and you should be able to excess it. Good luck.

A Grave’s Disease survivor for almost 30 years.

[Author]

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