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Thank you beautiful people who replied to my desperate post the other day.
Im really sorry but I dont have the time right now to reply to your comments and questions but just to let you know Im plodding on. Feeling better physically, but who knows how long that will last as it changes all the time. My energy levels are good and I feel very alert ( no brain fog anymore and my hair is growing a teeny weeny bit) but Im still very depressed and anxious about everything and feeling agoraphobic. I dont feel at all like the normal me, even though i function in a normal way, I guess. ( but cant cope with full time work or socialsing)Sometimes I wonder is its nothing to do wioth my Thryoid and that my mental health is actually all to do with my personality, life circumstances, stress, dissapointments etc etc. It so hard to explain all my psychological symptoms, they fluctuate and can be very disturbing.
Anyway, just to recap. Have had Graves diagnosed for 11 years, on ATDS all that time, never really stable except for about four months. Lots of things happened in that time obviously. Also think i had Graves a long time before diagnosis.
Anyway became very unwell, more mentally than physically 2 years ago and my world collapsed.
Came back to NZ and had RAI in Jan 2009. Went Hypo quite quickly, then took replacement and went Hyper then crashed into HYPO hell quite qucikly after that. It took about four months of Hypo to finally get my levels within normal range and I understand that you do not get well immediately. Diane and Ski have told me that many times
” title=”Smile” /> and that it can take along time to recover. Its just that I feel embarassed telling people Im still not normal ( like friends, Doctor and even on these sites) when my results are so good. I also feel like I cant even reassure myself when Im freaking out or cryinng uncontrollable that it is or was ever my thyroid and that me feel even more frightened.
Im currently on 135mcg Thyroxine daily have been on that dose for about 8 weeks.Anyway, Im having blood tests taken weekly and last week,
they were; FT4 = 15, tsh 1.6 and FT3 4.6 (cant remember ranges off top of my head, but i did put them on my last post)
this week: FT4 = 18, tsh .90 and FT3 5.2
Are these stable yet? would these small changes affect me in any way either physically or mentally. Also at what point do you start tweaking the meds to suit you properly. Ive been discharged from former private Endo and he has left me in the care of my GP ( who knows nothing about Thyroid and is more concerned about my mental health and anti depressants, which im on and i seriously wonder if he ever beleived any of the emotional symptoms were thyroid related) .
I am however going to see a new ENDO/specialist at a public hospital to get a complete checkup but I am a waiting list.Just wondering what to do next….am starting to give up the notion of ever being the same person again and being able to cope in the "real world" again and that makes me feel so lost and desperate.
Oh someone asked about my female hormones, well I get Horrendous PMS for 10 days before my period by my period is regular ( every 28 days on the dot) and im still ovulating Ive had my hormones checked and Im not even perimenoapusal.
I ahev got low ferritin and iron ( but am taking my iron a long way away from my thyroxone ). My cholesterol is high too (great!!!)anyway,
thanks for listening. Am trying to keep going…buts its a lonely and scary ride.love lauren x
