Doctors sure take a verbal beating now and then. Some deservedly so. When we’re sick, though, we sure are glad to see them, huh?
I thought this was pretty appropriate for this forum:
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley
motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.
The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage, “Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?”
The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, “So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take valves out, fix ’em, put ’em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?”
The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic:
“Try doing it with the engine running.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I actually pulled this old one on one of the ER docs that treated me during diagnosis:
Once the dust had settled and I was somewhat stabilised a young doc (by my old guy standards anyhow!) came in and was talking to me about Graves, my prognosis, etc. After the serious biz was done I mentioned my awful hand tremors and asked him if I’d be able to play piano in the future. (Good thing he was young and therefore not wise to this tired old joke).
He said “sure- the beta blockers will block the excess adrenaline and you should be able to play just fine”. I said “Cool! I’ve never played one before!”.
He said something about sedating me and leaving me naked in the hallway so my comedy career ended as fast as it started…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another real-life story from my past:
Myself and partner owned a busy sales and service company. I took a call one afternooon from a very rude and pushy fella who identified himself as a doctor. He asked me if he could make an appointment “as his time was very valueable”. I politely told him that we handled things on a first come-first served basis and that he coud bring his item in any time that was convenient for him. He again stated that he was a doctor and I again told him that he could come in and wait his turn like everyone else. We closed the call and I didn’t give it another thought.
An hour later in walks a guy in full-blown “Hey look at me- I’m a doctor” regalia. Lab coat, scrubs, shoe covers, even a stethescope around his neck. This guy wanted the world to know that he was a doctor and was, in his mind, so important, that he actually cut the line, bellied up to the counter, and interrupted my partner as he was speaking with a customer. The nerve of this guy! I was speechless (rare huh?).
My partner never missed a beat: He look up at the rude doctor over his reading glasses, looked him up and down, lowered his eyes back to the receipt he was writing, and I’ll never forget what he said in perfect deadpan:
“Why don’t you strip down to your underwear and have a seat over there” as he motioned to a table over in the corner.
I fell out with laughter as did all the folks waiting in line. The doctor looked at me, at my partner, at all the people laughing, adjusted his lapels, and walked out in a huff.
It was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hope ya’ll are hangin tough- weekends can be rough. Thanks for the laughs and I hope I managed to get a little laughter out of you guys too.
See ya in the funny papers,
Boomer
