[buriedsunshine]

#1060313

Hi y’all! I’ve been lurking around here and you guys are all so helpful and kind. I thought I would share my story.

I was diagnosed with Graves 2 months after I graduated from college and turned 22 in June of 2013. I was dizzy, had headaches, was constantly tired and hungry, and a little crabby. So I finally went to the doctor August 2013 after I finished my “job” contract with my college. I thought I just had migraines but all of a sudden I’m taking a lot of blood tests and even an MRI to rule out brain stuff!

I started on Methimazole in September 2013 and was severely allergic. I actually searched “methimazole rash” on here and it was really helpful and helped ease my mind. I switched to PTU and felt extremely lethargic and lazy. I gained 15 pounds in 2 months, which is unusual for me (I used to run races and was pretty good with my diet). My endo didn’t want me to run until my levels became normal and the constant hunger made me indulge and eat too much, haha!

I didn’t want to take the PTU anymore and I went with the RAI route on December 12th. It’s been about a month and my levels are still high but I’m hopeful it’ll be low enough so I can start the journey of finding my Goldilocks synthetic hormone dose.

I learned a lot about myself these past five months and I’ve come to terms with the idea that Graves is a long journey that cannot be fixed overnight.

Anyway, I was wondering: how do you guys go to work and live normal lives with Graves? I sleep a lot, the fast heartbeat, and not knowing if I will feel good the next day makes me anxious about looking for a job. I just don’t know how I will feel tomorrow so taking on a career seems daunting. After I graduated I hoped that I would get a job in San Francisco and live like a 22-year-old but right now I moved back home with my parents and they support me financially. It’s nice and comforting – especially when I feel terrible in the middle of the night – but I can’t help but feel like I’m not living up to my potential (even though I am sick most days). Does this make sense?

Thank you all for reading. I know it’s kind of long. I haven’t commented on anyone’s stories or threads but I guarantee that I’ve probably read almost everyone’s stories as I have been lurking around here since September. I’m really thankful I found this forum!

[Ski]

#1181900

Welcome, buriedsunshine!

Your sunshine will come out again, I promise.

Believe it or not, you are kind of early in the process, and it actually sounds like you’re doing exactly the right thing for now. You need to focus on you, be grateful for small improvements, and keep your eye on the prize. You WILL get there. Thyroid hormone issues can take a while to resolve completely — I remember when I was diagnosed, the first thing my Dad said to me was “if you’re like everyone else I know with a thyroid problem, get ready for a long ride!” Not easy when it’s Graves’, but that’s exactly the attitude you have to take to keep your sanity.

You have come a LONG way and you sound like you’ve learned a lot, so try and celebrate the good things that have come from this, do whatever you can to get back to normal (even if it’s baby baby baby steps), and make sure to be your own best cheerleader along the way. Only YOU know how hard it can be, and only YOU know how hard you’re working, so pat yourself on the back and smile. If you have to say no to some things because you know that your body will not tolerate that right now, that’s fine. Make sure you say yes to things that fill your soul, that sustain you, and say no to things that tend to drain you.

Even patient-to-patient, this can vary widely, so I would not waste any time comparing yourself to anyone else. Try to notice improvements each day so you realize you’re headed in the right direction, that’s the goal. And I know this sounds perverse, but even when you’re figuring out your best replacement dose and perhaps over (or under)shoot your goal, try to breathe deep and realize that you have still learned something and moved forward, even though it may not feel that way in your body.

I would think this could be a really tough time to be looking for work, both due to the job market and also due to your health — if it were me, given that you have a “safe place” right now, I would keep looking as you’re progressing toward better health, and if something really jumps out at you and makes you excited, then it’d be worth exploring that, because that kind of job could easily HELP in your healing. And bottom line, each day you’re getting closer to feeling well again, so you can be confident of that much.

I’ll admit, when I was where you are, I was working, I had two little children to care for, and sometimes I thought I might just collapse, and probably a few times I did. I vividly recall missing something important for one of their classes and feeling as though the world would end. My kids were extremely forgiving (old enough to have developed the ability, thank God!), and it ended up being okay. Definitely had to stick close to home, do only the essentials, ask for help where it was available, but made it through without damaging myself or any member of my family.

So glad you shared! Let us know how things progress, you’re truly paying it forward by telling the tale.

[buriedsunshine]

#1181901

Ski,

Thank you for taking the time to reply. I read it twice because it really made me feel better. I especially liked the emphasis on me and how I feel. It’s difficult to explain to family members what I’m feeling because to them, I look totally fine and not at all “sickly” except for the thin hair, of course!

All in all, I’m trying to stay positive — it could always be worse and I’m glad I’m getting treatment!

[Author]

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