[Bobbi]

#1063519

I am really sorry for the situation you find yourself in right now. The nails "could" be related to your thyroid disease: a condition called onycholysis can occur while hyperthyroid, where the fingernails become partially separated from the fingertips. It would require a doctor to determine if that is what is going on with your nails.

Panic attack and anxiety symptoms can definitely be related to too much thyroid hormone. (Another indication of how ill you are.) I had panic attacks until my thyroid levels were controlled in the normal zone. Then they disappeared. When you experience one, it may help to know that your body will not have to endure it for very long. A doctor once told me that 20 minutes is about the limit for duration of a panic attack. Knowing that it would end, and soon, helped me to tolerate them.

It is up to you to work with your doctors to control your thyroid hormone levels. PTU can cross into the baby via breast milk as well. And there are new guidelines out about taking it (it has been shown to cause liver problems, especially in children), and whether or not it is still the medication of choice for nursing moms is not something I know. If it turns out that you cannot safely take either one and continue to breast feed, I will just say that babies have thrived on formula for a long time. It isn’t, perhaps, optimal. But it is a whole lot healthier for a baby to have formula than for the baby’s mother to ignore hyperthyroidism.

[Teamchris]

#1018251

Hi, I am new to all this. I found out during my pregnancy in 2009 that I had low TSH levels. In April of 2010 I was diagnosed Hyperthyroid, I also had a problem with my fingernails and toenails ALL OF THEM, UGH! The Nurse Practitioner that I had at the time said that it was a nail fungus. I don’t think that is the case though, it came on all of the sudden and affects all my nails. I refused to take the medication for it because it is very hard on your liver and you can’t breastfeed while taking it. I also refused the Tapazole for the thyroid issue so that I could continue to breastfeed. (I was told there was no option for medication for breastfeeding women, which I later found out is incorrect, I can take PTU) I found a new doc and had a full work up, yesterday I received a diagnosis of Graves Disease, I wasn’t surprised I just wanted solid answers. I was told that I have a TSH level of .13 which is less then I had in April of .27, how low can you go?? But she also said that my T3 and T4 are in normal range, but I’m symptomatic with heart palpitations, debilitating anxiety , sweating, frequent BM’s, and headaches. I received a referral to an Endo, thank God, now I am just waiting for that appt. What I want to know is if anyone else has a problem with raised nail beds? Its really painful, it hurts to wear shoes, open a can of soda, do the dishes…
Also, does the anxiety go away with treatment for the thyroid issue? I cant stand it, I just want to crawl under my bed and I am normally a very confident person. I really think that I am going to die when I have a panic attack, its just awful.. I’ve cut myself off from my friends, I’ve even left the Grocery Store in the middle of shopping due to a panic attack. There is no way I could hold a job right now so I’m not even trying and its making me depressed and I dont want to take a boat load of medication, ugh….
Sorry for the vent session…

[mamabear]

#1063520

Hello and welcome…
Bobbi, that was a very very kind and gentle way of putting that Chris’ health is the most important thing to the baby right now! Chris and Bobbi is right, if you can not take medicine while breastfeeding then the best thing for your baby is to stop breastfeeding. There is no getting around it, YOU are the most important thing in that baby’s life and if you are in trouble with illness it wont do a dang bit of good to continue to be sick just because you feel that breastfeeding is the better choice. YES breastfeeding is the greatest gift a woman can give to her baby…ummm besides loves and attention and all the other good stuff ” title=”Wink” /> .

I didn’t have the support with my ds15 to breastfeed, I had no clue what to do and was told to stick a bottle in his mouth. 8 Years later with my 2nd(i was remarried) I had all the support from my husband and family. I was able to go 5months and I had two breast infections. It was rough but i did it.
18months later I had my 3rd child and was only able to nurse her 3 months due to the mastitis (breast infection)
and 2 years later with my last I was only able to nurse her 6 weeks. I was devastated, I cried so much but my health was more important than trying to nurse through the pain and the fevers and such.

I am all for it when you say that you want to nurse your baby! Kudos to you! But the fact is, is that you are sick and not taking medicine isn’t hurting you and your heart and muscles and everything inside of you. HyperThyroid also causes us to not think properly even though we think we are fine.

From your post it seems that it has been just about a year since your first diagnosis, that’s a long time to have this without any help. I would never tell a healthy woman to stop breastfeeding, I feel it is our choice. I wont tell you to stop either but I strongly suggest you do and know that you are doing the right thing for your baby.
I also have to mention that if you have a support group that you go to for breastfeeding, they might not understand why you must stop and will say that you shouldn’t stop. Please do not let that be the reason you continue to nurse. If you truly can only take the medicine without nursing then that is what has to be done.

I know what Graves does and I know what having a baby does with our moods and post pardum depression. You might not even know you have it until you say "wow wait I think I have PPD". I remember when my 4th was born in July… by October I was crying all the time and I finally said to my dh "oh I think I have PPD, I don’t know what to do". He laughed at me and said well lets get it figured out together, I was wondering when you were going to realize it!" It was his playful and thoughtful manner that helped me and talking about it with him was really what helped and I was over it fast. That doesn’t happen to everything but you can speak to someone you trust or see your dr about it. I’m not saying you have PPD but you should speak to someone even if it is just your dh about the possibility. Lack of sleep doesn’t help either!

Do you know the people in your grocery store? If so, tell some of them about your Graves. I have been going to my store for 14 years. 8 years ago when I was pregnant with 2nd child, I was alone and walking around just a few months pregnant. I was passing the courtesy desk and didn’t feel well. I touched the counter and said where is "G", they looked at me and yelled to her, she saw me and ran over and said ok come with me, took me to the back where the food court was and sat me down, bought me an ice tea and stayed with me for 20 minutes till I was ok. No one said a word to her about staying with me! They have helped me through out the years as well with the rest of the kids. Trust me when I had 3 kids screaming and I needed help they came running with funny faces to shut them up!
You might want to get to know people in the store, say hello to them, read and use their name from their name-tag every time you go there. It helps, and if you have a problem there sit for a few minutes even if it’s just on the bench in the front of the store. Keep a water with you, I started donig that and it helped when I had to sit for a few. At least I had the water already and would just sit and sip on the water.
The people at my store know me and know how I am, I never felt embarrassed at all. I tend not to get that way or care if others look at me but I never ever had that feeling from anyone at this store. They were always willing to help, I remember one cashier said "You call me by name every time you see, so what is your name?" It was nice to hear.

[mamabear]

#1063521

You WILL get through this, but it takes time and it takes medicine to help you. As for your feet, please discuss it with your Endo BUT also see a Podiatrist. You might have to shop around for a good one. I went through 3-4 before finding one I love. If you dont love your Podiatrist then dont go back. Thats that type of dr. in my book that I truly have to love because my feet are very important to me. I went to him one day for a recheck on my feet (i had ingrown toenail) and I had cut my thumb the day before and had a bandage on it. He looked and said what did you do? I said I hurt it and dont want to see my general dr. He laughed, made me take off bandage and he cleaned it and butterfly stitched it for me! ” title=”Very Happy” />
I know a pod dr. looks at feet so not sure if he will take care of hands as well or a dermatologist might be better to see but I know the pod dr. will be able to tell you if it’s a true fungus or just the graves.

Good luck and I’m sorry this was long but I can’t help it! ” title=”Wink” /> ” title=”Wink” />

[Teamchris]

#1063522

Thanks for all the response!No one in my life seems to understand how bad I really feel because they cant see anything wrong with me, I look the same, after all, so what is my problem? Well, it seems to me that everything is wrong, and it doesn’t help that I just recently had a baby and was diagnosed with Postpartum Depression. I was diagnosed in April of this year with Hyperthyroid and it seems the issue started during my pregnancy. I have an 11 year old that due to a bad first marriage with a lazy husband I was only able to nurse her for 3 months and I know it sounds crazy but, I have been sore about it ever since. I really just wanted to nurse this one and I didn’t want to be told that I couldn’t. The nurse practitioner that I saw first said absolutely no way could I nurse and take these meds, so I went to another doctor who said I could. I also spoke to the leader of our local chapter of La Leche League and we researched the latest information together and found that I can take PTU which is what my new doc had said. So, with all that in mind, I’m still not satisfied that I should nurse her and take those meds, so…. Now I want to talk with an Endocrinologist and my daughters pediatrician to really make an informed decision. She is almost 9 months old and I really only wanted to nurse her till 1 year. The problem is not formula, my first daughter thrived on formula, I think its great in some ways. Its the bond, its a special time when you are nursing your children, that is what I dont want to give up and it makes me sad. Sadness seems so intolerable to me right now and I know Im acting like a child stomping around cause Im not getting what I want. In the end I will make the right choice I just cant seem to pull it together right now.
It is nice to read other posts from people with personality changes, it helps me to know that I am not losing my mind after all. I am really terrified of all the panic attacks and heart palpitations that I’m going to have until I get into see the Endo, which wont be for at least 3-5 weeks!We dont have an endocrinologist locally or even nearby, the closet one is an hour and a half away and my nerves are too frayed for that long of a drive, so my doc is trying to set up a "tele-visit" with one of the Endo’s from UC Davis in Sacramento. I’m excited to get moving on this but it is taking a long time, ugh! Sorry that I am rambling on, my thoughts are so spontaneous and erratic! I was always so independent and now I feel like I have to have someone hold my hand for everything, especially decisions, and then I get suspicious of the person that I wanted help from in the first place, what a nightmare. So now I’m driving people away and making people crazy!!

[mamabear]

#1063523

Teamchris wrote:Thanks for all the response!No one in my life seems to understand how bad I really feel because they cant see anything wrong with me, I look the same, after all, so what is my problem?
Unless you are going through it yourself no one will understand. BUT you can educate them, let them come here or ask them to read up on Graves. The more information you provide to them the easier it will be for them to look and read and learn.
Well, it seems to me that everything is wrong, and it doesn’t help that I just recently had a baby and was diagnosed with Postpartum Depression. I was diagnosed in April of this year with Hyperthyroid and it seems the issue started during my pregnancy. I have an 11 year old that due to a bad first marriage with a lazy husband I was only able to nurse her for 3 months and I know it sounds crazy but, I have been sore about it ever since.
You might not want to hear this but I will say it anyway… You might be thinking it but never really did it. During something like this is when we tend to look at ourselves and realize that no one is perfect and forgiveness is something that doesn’t help the other person get off the hook, forgiveness helps US to heal. I would try to think about your bitterness towards your ex when it comes to the nursing and forgive him for it. He isn’t perfect and could very well be a jerk or the nicest person in the world either way we all have faults. I wasn’t a great wife to my ex either, I was young and stupid. My 2nd marriage is different.
I really just wanted to nurse this one and I didn’t want to be told that I couldn’t.
Having hind sight with my mastitis and knowing I had no choice but to stop or I would become very toxic I was upset as well that I had no choice. UNTIL I REALIZED I DID HAVE A CHOICE!!!! I CHOSE to stop, I truly didn’t have to, the nurse said I could go toxic and hurt myself and go on antibiotics and see if that would help. I chose to stop! Even though it was due to making a choice I still was the one who made it.
Like you said, You will make the right choice. But you are forgetting, that it IS your choice!!! No one can force you to do anything, there is a bump in the road of motherhood and you must choose! You choosing to no longer nurse if your choice and believe me I know the pain and anger that comes with stopping. That baby’s face looking up at you and smiling while nursing is the most wonderful feeling in the world. YES you are right, it will stink and you will miss, but will be able to keep that bond as long as you continue to bottle feed the same way. Very close to your body and with love! I can’t think of a better way, that way there is no loosing that bonding time.
Sorry that I am rambling on, my thoughts are so spontaneous and erratic! I was always so independent and now I feel like I have to have someone hold my hand for everything, especially decisions, and then I get suspicious of the person that I wanted help from in the first place, what a nightmare. So now I’m driving people away and making people crazy!!

No reason to be sorry, you have Graves and PPD. WOW!! that is something isn’t it! I need you to speak with your daughter who is 11 and explain to her that you are "sick" BUT you are ok and will be fine. Remember to explain that tehre is an illness but that it will be fixed and for her not to worry. She is 11 and isn’t a fool, she knows something is wrong and you need her to be honest with you about how you might be treating her. BUT dont’ let her sucker you either.

Continue to vent here, you’re doing great!

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