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  • Anonymous
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    Post count: 93172

    Good one Denise!
    Casey

    Anonymous
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    Post count: 93172

    That is just toooooooooooooo funny
    ( + =
    PAULA

    Anonymous
    Participant
    Post count: 93172

    THE STORY OF THE THYROID
    GLAND

    Once upon a time there was a little thyroid gland, no bigger than 25 grams, who lived in the
    throat of an artist called Kire-Naj. Kire-Naj, being a workaholic, never took time out to care
    about his own body. Other than observing the surface of it in various reflecting items. One day
    the thyroid gland decided to make its insignificant existence noted by starting to harrass its host.

    So it decided to go into early retirement, and stopped producing thyroxine, the hormone that a
    thyroid gland provides the body with. Thyroxine affects the synthesis of mRNA in the nuclei, and
    through that the synthesis of proteins vital to the body. The entire metabolism is either speeded
    up or slowed down depending on the amount of thyroxine in the body.

    Kire-Naj’s thyroid gland felt that its host had been driving in the fast lane for too long, and
    decided to slow him down. The most successful way of doing this was to stop the production of
    thyroxine.

    But the thyroid gland was a sly little devil. It knew all too well that the first symptoms would
    never give it away as the main villain.

    So when Kire-Naj during the years got cold hands and white fingers even in the summer, felt
    increasingly cold and kept getting muscle cramps, he blamed on bad circulation. He got more
    and more tired, slept more, and felt the need to roll up under a warm cover or take hot baths.

    As time went by the fatigue increased. Kire-Naj had to muster up all of his will-power in order to
    complete all the work projects he had going. But there wasn’t enough energy for everything. His
    relationships crashed and he became more and more depressed. Even his brain got slower. The
    only good thing that came of this was that his stuttering almost totally disappeared, according to
    Kire-Naj because he had stopped drinking alcohol. The truth was that he had got so slack, or you
    could say relaxed, that for the first time in 40 years he could call anyone without stuttering, or
    even getting stuck, when he introduced himself.

    When he one night realized that he hadn’t managed to get out of bed for 24 hours, he blamed on
    emotional problems and the mid-life crisis. Life was hell for him until he one day discovered
    blood in his saliva. Now, when he finally called a doctor, he suspected cancer! Or aids!

    Meanwhile his body was desperately trying to compensate for the loss of thyroxine. His
    hypophysis was spitting THS like crazy. THS is a substance that stimulates the thyroid gland, and
    Kire-Naj’s THS level was 50. It’s normally around 5. But it was no use. When a thyroid gland has
    decided to quit, it quits, and that’s final.

    After going through endless examinations and tests Kire-Naj got a call from his doctor early one
    morning. The criminal was caught. And it wasn’t cancer or HIV, it was this plain, undramatic
    little thing that Kire-Naj barely knew existed; The Thyroid Gland!

    There it was, comfortably embedded in protective muscle and adipose tissue, enjoying its
    retirement. It didn’t have to produce one single molecule of thyroxine, and it took great pleasure
    in watching its host, buried in medical litterature, trying to find out everything about its life and
    functions. Through the sound membranes it could even hear Kire-Naj explaining to his friends,
    going on and on about the three-month sick-leave, and how he was going to use that to realize an
    old dream. He was going to do the world’s cleanest exhibition, in which the thyroid gland would
    play a part.

    Kire-Naj proved to be far from alone in owning a thyroid gland on strike. His father got his daily
    dose of thyroxine out of a medicine jar. That’s something you have to get used to doing every
    day for the rest of your life, thyroid glands are glands with principles. Other friends and family
    members were also familiar with the little jar with the dosage in giant print.

    So now it could peacefully doze off, knowing that Kire-Naj would think of it every morning when
    he opened his little medicine jar. What remained to be seen was how long it would take the other
    neglected organs to think of the same brilliant idea for making themselves noticed!

    Transl. Sussi Björkfors

    Anonymous
    Participant
    Post count: 93172

    I sure would like the hyper version for friends and docs!

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