[Andie74]

#1017875

Hello all,

okay i hope to find help supoort and answers here….

Backgrond: I am uninsured so conventional measures are out… but this is the main issue…. My husband (40) and I (36) have been amrried for 7 years have four beautiful kids 13,4,3,2 after my youngest was born I went thru issues that was told were peri menopause…okay right fair enough… then after almost a year of not getting better but worse I was talking with a friend who urged me to go for testing ( she herself is a graves’ survivor) i was DX.

Now my DH is trying with all his might to understand and be supportive, however , SEX… is the major issue or lack there of… I have tried to expalin that i have no control of this that I wish I could turn back time and change this. I have tried to make an effort but I find it so hard to even engage with him sexually, not by choice ( I also have fibroids {which hurt} ) there is nothing more than I want to be close to him in that way ( he is a very sexual person) .

So my question is how or what can I do for him ??? how do I get him to understand I am not doing this on purpose. How do I help him deal????

Our marriage hit the biggest downturn yesterday with the talk of divorce… Please help me find a way to either start to enjoy/want sex more or get him to understand that i am not doing this to be spiteful, that i just dont have control. and how he should can deal with it in the interm…

thanks Andie

[Bobbi]

#1061413

First off, Andie, please only post once. There is a long string of posts from you, waiting to be approved. What I suspect happened is that you didn’t see your post appear, and then posted again. Several times. We require posts from "new" members to be approved before they even appear on the board. That is because the board was experiencing pornography and lots of SPAM. When moderators/administrators have to approve the initial post, it saves us lots of time, and –trust me — lots of aggravation. Noone liked wading through porn and SPAM.

Second, getting treated is not an option, it is a necessity. I realize that without insurance, your options are limited. But hyperthyroidism is potentially lethal without treatment. When it isn’t lethal, it can make us invalids. So, just as you put gas in your car, or replace fan belts, or replace batteries in the car, you MUST treat your hyperthyroidism. There are options that are less expensive than others; there are sometimes ways in which people can get treatment without insurance. Sometimes it just requires cutting off the TV cable or other cost-cutting measures — temporarily — to get the disease under control. I don’t mean to minimize the problems when there is no health insurance. But I DO mean to emphasize the problems that occur without treatment. They are HUGE. And, with treatment, we DO get well again. Without treatment however, we get worse.

Libido issues are common for those of us who are hyperthyroid. You are very, very ill when you are hyperthyroid. Would you expect to be sexually active if you had just been hit by a train? Of course not. Well, hyperthyroidism is like being hit by a metabolic train. Nothing in the body works the way it should. ALL resources are strained to the max. You need to get yourself healthy again to expect normal body functions, no matter what they are.

[Andie74]

#1061414

I am sorry about the multiple posts, but you hit it dead on everytime I posted my comp would time out so I wasnt sure if it went thru… thought maybe it was the title or something.

As for treatment I am being treated via a free clinic just cant do surgery etc… Your response about the train made sence to me but how do I get my husband to see it that way. As he thinks that this is all in my head because it came on so suddenly after i was told it was peri-menopause then to find out it it graves’.

He now gets the part that I didnt make this happen it just did, but cant get past the loss of sexual desire part, doesnt see how one has to do with the other so to speak…

[Kimberly]

#1061415

Hello – The Graves’ Disease Foundation has two bulletins that might be helpful in getting your husband to understand what you are dealing with.

From the home page at http://www.ngdf.org, click on “publications” (ignore the drop-down options) and then “psychosocial & emotional effects.” There is one called “An Open Letter to Husbands of Graves’ Patients” and another called “What is Wrong With Me? I’m Not Myself Anymore”.

I would post links, but I seem to be Internet-challenged this evening. Technology…gotta love it…

[Author]

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